Why hello, friends! So nice to be back after a long summer full of unexpected happenings. It’s now a delightfully brisk autumn, my favorite season in which to travel (and really, to do almost anything *wink*). And I’m happy to say I’m recently returned from autumn in NYC, free of FOMO on vacation!
My mom and I went to New York City last weekend to celebrate her recent retirement. It was a fantastic weekend (as all our girls’ trips are), even if we did not do many quite so many typically “NYC” things. It was a great reminder to make sure your destinations are always about you, not the other way around. It’s easy to get caught up in the mindset of “well I’m here, so we must do ___.” Also known as FOMO — fear of missing out. It’s a real thing, and so, so easy to get caught up in. But don’t let FOMO dictate your vacation.
Past tense FOMO?
Allow me a rabbit trail to Thailand to explain. Hubs and I went to Thailand in 2010. We had the best time. It’s one of our favorite vacations. Recently I was chatting with a former State Department employee (i.e., a well travelled individual) about her trip to Thailand. She recounted all the fun places they had visited on their Thai adventure. I started to get FOMO about a past vacation! Is that even possible?! I didn’t even recognize some of the places she mentioned. But ever the wise traveller, she brought it all into perspective and said (something like), “Hey, people need different things when they travel. It all depends on your various current circumstances.”
Indeed. When we went to Thailand, we were living in northeast China. It was January. The temperature change from our Chinese hometown to Phuket was 100 degrees F. We needed to thaw out. We needed to chill (to warm??) and relax and see the sun. We hadn’t seen our family and friends or had much familiar food in six months. Thailand for us was a place to reconnect — with each other, with pizza, with the sun. And if we saw a few sights along the way (we did, of course), so be it. There’s always time for another trip to Thailand. Maybe. Either way, no regrets, and no genuine FOMO. We did indeed have a great trip, and it was exactly what we needed at that point in our lives.
No present tense FOMO
Let’s head back to NYC. I’d been planning this trip (secretly) for months. I hadn’t been to NYC to see the touristy sights in years, and I was excited to again be a tourist in New York. But honestly, we were kind of exhausted. I’d been sick off and on for a month. My mom, too, I think had been busy and tired from retirement — moving, setting up a new house, paperwork, etc. We needed rest. NYC is not typically high on the list of restful destinations.
So, you can either have vacation FOMO and let your destination dictate your actions, or you can take charge and make it work for you. On our train north, we nixed our touring itinerary and opted for a very go-with-the-flow plan. That’s very unlike both of us. But it was what we needed. This trip was about us. Spending time together was our main goal, not ticking off sights from our itinerary.
And so, we didn’t see the Freedom Tower or walk the Brooklyn Bridge or have pizza, or many of the other things we had planned to do in our 30 hours in NYC, but we did laugh and make memories and thoroughly enjoy our trip. Isn’t that the goal after all? Once again, no FOMO on this vacation, and I wish you none on yours.
Need some help making sure you’re not missing out? Check out my research technique or drop me a note! I’m always happy to help!
Dream big, travel well.